Money | Self | Humor

Please, Please — Stop Buying These Get Rich Quick Courses

A look at what should be obvious.

Sean Kernan
5 min readMay 4, 2023


via The Lazy Artist Gallary (Pexels)

If I ever rent a Lamborghini for one hour, remind me to take 50 pictures in front of it and sell a get-rich-quick course.

It’s always the same formula, isn’t it? A dude standing in a posh house (he rented) or in front of a library full of sports cars that aren’t his.

He’s either totally blinged out in his suit or he’s wearing pajamas to reinforce the leisure of his success.

This could be you, amigo. Yes, you.

These Superman pajamas could be around your legs — at noon on a Tuesday, with a pair of models waiting for you in the bedroom because you’ve mastered the art of seduction (← Hyperlink to Pickup Artist Course).

In his long sales videos, he often stands in his living room with a funny whiteboard with generic platitudes as the variables.

X-Axis: Your potential.

Y-Axis: Your confidence.


Author via iconsforfree

If all marketing was hell, these dudes would be in the very bottom rung. They’d be showering in fire ants.

I hate guru math.

I nearly worked for a guru out of college

I’d just graduated from college and was scanning for marketing jobs.

I made the mistake of looking on Craigslist. I came across a position working for a guru. I don’t want to get sued so we’ll call it, “Wooshbag Millionaire.”

He was looking for someone to help him build out his Wooshbag Millionaire Program.

I was desperate for work so I did the interview and immediately got the heebie-jeebies. For starters, he was just a weird dude. Second, he looked nothing like the photos he advertised. I’d never been catfished by an employer nor have I since. Third, he didn’t get rich in a way that qualified him to sell this course.



Sean Kernan

Writer and writing instructor. Always on the hunt for a good story. That guy from Quora. Writing out of Tampa, Florida.